this article describes a research about the stigma of violence suffered by women in their relationship with intimate partners. it focalizes the understanding on which determining factors in the aggressive/abusive relation concur in order that women feel so many difficulties to denounce their aggressors. we used the mundane critical phenomenological method and, as an implement, we used audio-record interviews. the results show that these women endure several modalities of violence in the relation with their partners. feeling psychologically stigmatized, they avoid denouncing because they do not want to be recognized by society as trashed and ill-treated women.